Undercover Scoop [TMNT/G.I. Joe]

[Jayrich]

Hello, I'm that jerk that perverts your favorite cartoon into porn, better known as Jayrich. I don't know how many people have even heard of me, but I'd just figure I post one of my recent works just to see if anyone has any interest. So here's a fic about Irma and The Baroness getting down and dirty.

Hope you enjoy...




Undercover Scoop



“Oh, what a day…”

Irma lamented over her current situation as she exited the local coffee shop in Times Square, carrying four Grande Mocha Lattes. It wasn’t enough that she was the secretary to Burne Thompson, but she was also designated the coffee girl for the day, due to a poker game gone awry. Still, with a shaky dignity she took on the task as she marched down the street, back to the Channel 6 News Building. Reaching the corner, she came to a stop when she noticed the light was red.

C’mon…” She whined. “…I can’t be late with this! Oh, how can this get any worse?”

And almost on cue, the Channel 6 secretary got her answer as a Black SUV sped from around the corner, startling her enough to make her splash the drinks on an unsuspecting skateboarder next to her. All eyes continued to be on the SUV though, as it rammed against two parked cars before coming to a stop within the drop-off area at a ritzy Hotel. A moment later, the doors would open and several armored men would step out; all of them flanking a raven-haired woman wearing an all-black leather ensemble, with stylish glasses.

The group quickly barged into the Hotel’s lobby, marching towards the welcome desk area where a noticeable shaken concierge stood, unable to move. The group converged on the desk as the woman adjusted her glasses and stared daggers through the young man.

“Room 1983, is it ready?” She inquired in a foreign accent.

“Y-y-y-yes, ma’am!” The concierge nervously responded as he handed over the keys as his hand trembled. “Sp-specified to y-your exact requests.”

She snatched the keys from his hand and scowled. “It had better be. MOVE OUT!”

“Yes ma’am.” One of her men responded. “ON THE MOVE!!!”

And like a synchronized unit, they proceeded towards the elevator area, keeping their lovely leader enveloped in their protection as other Hotel guests looked on in shock. Outside of the grand building Irma could see the scene unfold, but couldn’t hear a word of it. She quickly lost interest though, as she noticed the foursome of drinks she was holding were now doused over a fellow pedestrian.

“Just perfect! Now I gotta get some more!” Turning on her heels, she started back towards the coffee shop when a familiar ring tone crossed her ears. Recognizing it as her turtle communicator, she pulled it out of her purse and flipped it open, just as her foot came down on top of another’s.

“Oh, WHOOOOAA!!!”

Losing her balance, she fell forward and landed on top of a pedestrian, who had the unfortunate luck of being the same one drenched in mocha lattes earlier. “Oop, sorry!” She told him as another voice came over the communicator.

“Irma, are you there?”

It was April, and Irma scrambled to grab her communicator as she picked herself up. “April, what’s up?”

“I need your help, Irma.” The reporter told her friend.

Irma quickly ducked into a nearby alleyway, thinking the conversation might need to be private. “What’s the matter? The turtles in trouble?”

“No, they’re OK.” April replied. “What I need is your help on getting a scoop.”

Irma nearly dropped the communicator as she stood in disbelief. “Are you kidding me? You’re calling over a story!?”

“Irma, just listen!” April countered. “I found out that some top secret terrorist organization is in New York! They were here to kidnap the Statue of Liberty with the Shredder, but the guys teamed up with some secret soldiers to stop them.”

“Yeah, and?” Irma replied.

“And one of their Lieutenants is still on the loose in the city.” April continued. “If I can get the scoop on their location…”

“Wait, April…” Irma interrupted. “What do you need me for?”

“I’m getting to that.” April told her. “I found out the Hotel where they’re staying…it’s the Roosevelt Grand.”

The name was familiar to the secretary, and as she looked up she got the answer why; it was the very hotel she was in front of, where the whole scene unraveled. “You gotta be kidding me.”

“Irma? You there?”

“I’m here.” Irma said into the communicator. “In more ways than one.”

“You’re there? Great!” April cheered. “I just need you to sneak in and get some info on the guest book and room numbers. And if you can get a photo of her—!”

“And just how am I supposed to do that!? Dress up as some bellboy and sneak in to…” Irma stopped herself when she realized she just gave April the means to encourage her for this favor. “This is gonna be like Cincinnati, isn’t it?”



A ding filled the hallways the elevator doors slid open to reveal Irma, now clad in a bellboy jacket and hat. “Just get the room number and photo, she says. It’ll be quick, she says.”

Though she was wary about taking on this task, she exited the car and walked down the hall in front of her, constantly repeating a room number to herself. “Room 1983, room 1983…”

As she wandered the halls, her eyes actively scanned each number on the door she passed, until finally coming across her destination. She stood in front of it for a moment, nervousness causing her body to tremble until she took a deep breath and exhaled, calming herself as she knocked on the door. There wasn’t an immediate answer as all she heard was silence. The Baroness’ voice from the other side would break that silence, though.

“Who is it?”

“Uh, um…Room Service?”

“I did not order any food.” She responded. “What are you—oh, it is you.”

Irma was shocked to hear that as the door unlocked and swung open to show The Baroness, wearing a lush black bathrobe. “Well, what are you standing there for? Come in.”

“O…OK…” Irma replied cautiously, complying with the request as to not look suspicious. As she entered the spacious suite, she saw the extravagant luxury which surrounded the supposed terrorist Lieutenant. The room looked like it could belong to a movie star, with its lavish curtains, lush carpeting and expensive furniture which included a hanging chandelier above the room. Irma was noticeably in awe over the sight, and The Baroness could see it.

“I take it this is the first time your superiors have allowed you into one of these rooms?” She inquired.

“Uh…you could say that.” Irma replied.

“Yes, it is rather elegant…yet still below my standards.” The raven-haired Cobra Lieutenant shut the door behind them and walked over to join her guest. “I suppose you will have to do, too.”

Irma was confused by that statement. “I…I will?”

“I did not think I would have use for you, today…” Baroness continued as she grabbed a bottle of champagne and poured herself a glass. “…but that IDIOT’S plan has caused me to reconsider! And as unbelievable as it is to me, it was actually sound when I first heard it.”

She poured another glass and handed it to the disguised bellhop as she continued. “Steal the Statue of Liberty and turn it into a gigantic robot that’ll fight for Cobra. Ridiculous, yes…but still plausible…until that idiot commander decided to perform the transformation first, instead of just taking it!”

The Baroness took a lengthy swig of her glass, before placing it down on a nearby table and continuing. “What made it worse was when those cursed Joes show up with reinforcements. I still have no idea where Snake Eyes obtained his new ninja friends…or why they underwent some genetic amphibian mutation to make them stronger. And I believed Mindbender was a disturbed doctor.”

Irma knew she was talking about the Turtles, but decided to remain quiet as the black-clad villainess strolled away from her, and towards a set of double doors. “No matter. I still escaped while that buffoon was taken into custody. Unfortunately Destro is still in England finishing our business deal...meaning I am unable to relieve my stress with him. But enough of that…”

Pushing open the doors, walking into the suite’s bedroom, which was just as impressive as the rest of the dwelling. “You did not come to hear me talk, you came to help relieve this stress…”

She turned on her spiked heels and slowly sat down on the bed with her legs crossed. They wouldn’t remain that way however, as she slowly uncrossed them, while letting her robe slip open. Placing her hands on her knees, she spread them wide as Irma got more than an eye full for a lifetime. For right in front of her sat The Baroness, her perfectly round breasts hanging freely out of her robe and her shaved snatch invitingly waiting.

“…so, you can get to work.”

[Jayrich]

Immediately Irma dropped the glass in her hands, which thankfully didn’t shatter thanks to the carpeting. Her entire body was trembling now, as this was the last thing she expected to encounter for doing April’s favor. “Uh…I, uh…I…”

“What’s the matter?” Baroness asked. “Why are you not on your knees?”

Irma gulped as she slowly began to back away. “Well, I’ve…been working a double-shift, you know. I mean, my knees are already killing me…”

The femme fatale simply sighed as she adjusted her glasses. “I believe I understand now.”

“Y-y-you do?” Irma asked.

“Of course…” Baroness replied. “…this is obviously your first time. I ask for experience and I receive the opposite. Very well…”

Standing up, she reached out and grabbed Irma’s hand, preventing her from backing out. She then led her back over to the bed and sat back down, causing Irma to lose her balance and fall to her knees. “It’s simple, merely use your lips and your tongue to pleasure me as best you can.”

Irma’s heartbeat almost doubled as she found her head between the Baroness’ thighs. “Well, you see…it’s just that—MMMPPHH!!!”

“Please me! That is an order!” Baroness commanded as she grabbed the back of the bellhop’s head and shoved it until her crotch. She let out a moan as Irma’s tongue flailed wildly in panic over her situation. After a moment the Baroness loosened her hold, grinning pleasantly back down at her.

“You are a natural with your tongue.” She told the bellhop. “But do not be afraid to use your fingers as well.”

Irma knew she was in too deep now. Her only means of escape meant having to comply, and so she did. Using her middle finger, she brushed and rubbed it against Baroness’ vulva, bringing out a tremble of delight from the Cobra officer. “Why did you have to help out April?” She thought to herself. “Why couldn’t you have just called in sick today?”

Irma noticed the Baroness spreading her legs wider, and took it as an invitation for her finger to invade. The digit split her pussy lips and delved in to the knuckle as the Baroness bit her lower lip. In an out she teased the digit, going at a slow pace, the way she would like it. Before she knew it, she had climbed into the bed with the Baroness, and had straddled her leg for better positioning. Two fingers were now probing the raven-haired vixen’s pussy, but it wasn’t enough to satiate her.

“Yes…” She moaned in pleasure. “…but I require more.” Reaching over to under her pillow, she brought out a jet black phallic object that she handed to Irma, who grew shocked at its appearance.

“You…want me to—!”

“Indeed.” Baroness answered for her. “And do not be afraid to be rough.”

Taking the object, which had the iconic Cobra logo on it, she proceeded to follow the Baroness’ order, until her hand was stopped. Grabbing Irma’s wrist, the Cobra officer brought the dildo to her ruby lips and gave it a long lick, all while maintaining eye contact with her bellhop, who couldn’t help but be affected by her gaze.

“This is so wrong…” She thought to herself “…so wrong…so why is this turning me on?”

As she finished her lick, she released her hold and allowed Irma to guide her own hand. Bringing it to the Baroness’ snatch, she teased it momentarily by rubbing the tip against her pussy lips, and then pausing for a moment as she remembered the order gave to her…’don’t be afraid to be rough.’ She wasn’t, and she shoved the dildo deep into the Cobra officer’s snatch, eliciting a shocked yelp of passion from her, followed by a lustful grin. The sensation aroused Irma as well, as she could feel her knees quivering and her nipples hardening.

Baroness could sense it as well, and decided to exacerbate her sensation as she noticed the bellhop had straddled her leg. It didn’t take much as she gently rubbed it against Irma’s crotch, almost distracting her as she continued to probe her pussy with the Cobra Dildo. The Baroness was almost overwhelmed as she began to fondle her own breasts while biting down on her upper lip with a loving moan. The sight was an arousing and envious one for Irma. Though part of her did find the Baroness desirable, she also felt jealous that her own bosom fell just short of the rack in front of her. It was similar to how she felt about April’s own gifts, but she dealt with it.

Her hand speed increased, and almost worked like a piston as she worked the black phallus in and out of the Cobra Officer’s snatch. She could even feel her hips starting to rock and sway in rhythm with her arm movements. And what’s more, Irma could feel the Baroness’ leg rubbing her even more. She began to moisten between her legs, as her body quivered in delight. Meanwhile the Baroness was trembling in pleasure, as she reached her climax. She arched her back, sending her plump breasts into the air as her juices spilled out onto the bed. It was an amazing sight for Irma, and one that also brought her relief.

“Good, she came.” She said to herself. “Now I can sneak out while she’s—!”

“You are quite gifted…” The Baroness complimented, only slightly fatigued. “…no one but Destro has made me climax that fast. I feel you should be rewarded.”

“Uh, that’s OK.” Irma debated, knowing what she meant. “You know the saying; a good day’s work is—WHOA!”

Before the Channel 6 Secretary knew it, she found herself the one on her back in bed, as the Baroness stood up at the foot of it. Irma’s skirt was then snatched off by the Raven-haired Lieutenant, exposing her white cotton panties; a sight that brought a smirk ton the Baroness’ face.

“As expected.” She said.

“Uh, my sexy panties are in the laundry?” Irma explained.

Baroness paid it no mind though, as she grabbed Irma’s panties and pulled them off, tossing them aside before crawling back onto the bed and creeping closer to her. “You…really don’t have to do this!” She said nervously. “I really am satisfied.”

“Do not worry.” Baroness told her as she lifted Irma’s legs and hips. “It will be my pleasure…but yours more so.”

Sliding her hands under Irma’s knees, she gently lifted them up and opened her legs further as the raven-haired beauty’s face became lost in Irma’s muff. Almost immediately the secretary could feel her tongue going crazy against her pussy lips and attacking her clit. A wave of pleasure crashed into her, leaving her almost motionless as she moaned faintly in delight. The Baroness’ lips attended to all that lied between her thighs, never showing signs of relenting or even slowing. Irma barely lifted herself up for a better view, and propped herself up on her elbows as she gazed down her body, and witnessed the Baroness attentively tonguing her snatch.

She couldn’t speak a work, she could only mutter a faint moan of passion as not even her elbows could hold her up, and she fell back flat against the bed. The Baroness could feel her body quiver from ever tongue lashing and, unbeknownst to the bellhop, wore a devious grin because of it. She then moved her left hand up Irma’s slender frame, feeling for her bosom and grabbing firm hold once she located her right breast. It was too much for the young secretary to bear, as she gripped the bed sheets tightly. Her breath shortened and her body tensed, and before she could help herself, she cried out in passion.

“UUUHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

Her orgasm came quick and hard as she squirted her juices all over the Baroness’ face, a moment that the Cobra Officer actually enjoyed. She knew that her new playmate was now putty in her hands. And as she slowly rose to her knees on the bed, she stared down at the bellhop, who could barely catch her breath. “I take it that you are satisfied?”

“I…I think I just…saw the planets align.” Irma wearily replied.

The Baroness smirked again. “Then I hope that you are not too tired…”

Climbing off of the bed, she seductively strolled over to a nearby dressed and pulled open the top drawer. “There is something that I have wanted to do for a long time, and I believe you are the right candidate.”

Pulling out what looked to Irma like bulky black panties, she bent over and stepped into them, pulling them up. For a moment Irma breathed a sigh of relief as she believed she was getting dressed. But as the Baroness snapped the panties up around her waist, she saw what the Cobra Officer had truly donned…a strap-on.

“I can barely walk, and she wants to use THAT on me!?” Irma thought.

“There is something about you.” The Baroness continued as she climbed back into the bed. “Something…strangely appealing.”

Irma’s first orgasm let her spent, too winded to resist. But part of the secretary didn’t want to, even though she knew what was coming. “Do not worry.” The Baroness told her. “I assure you…I will not be gentle.”

And with that lack of reassurance, the Baroness guided the tip of her strap-on to Irma’s wet pussy lips, and slowly pushed it in. Irma’s eyes rolled up as her head jerked back from the sensation. She had thrust deeper than any deeper she had used on herself. She then lifted her head slightly to see the Baroness hovering right over her, with a seductive smirk.

“You are so cute when you are aroused.”

Before the secretary could respond to that compliment, she found her lips smothered against the Baroness’. It was a deep, passionate kiss that softened her defenses even more. As her tongue invaded Irma’s mouth, she continued her strokes, sending the strap-on deep into her pussy again and again. Her breasts almost enveloped Irma’s rack, and forced influence on them as they swayed back & forth in coalition with the Cobra Officer’s strokes. Their nipples rubbed together, which turned on the Baroness even more and excited Irma to no end.

“I can’t believe this is happening.” Irma thought, barely able to keep her mind together. “It’s so good…gonna cum again…”

The raven-haired temptress could sense it from her as well, and wished to draw it out. “That’s right…cum for me.”

[Jayrich]

Her hips drove forward over and over as she picked up Irma’s leg, holding it against her shoulder as she drilled her snatch relentlessly. Their breasts jiggled wildly from the love-making, as the sweat made their skin glisten from the sun shining in through the curtains. With every thrust Irma moaned uncontrollably, which drove the Baroness wild.

“That is it…cum for your Baroness!”

And she did. With on final stroke the secretary reached her second climax. She reached out and grasped the Baroness breast as her body tensed in orgasmic delight, before falling back limp to the bed. The Cobra Officer licked her ruby red lips over the sight in front of her. She was no stranger to this, as she often broke in female Cobra Soldiers for their initiations. But for some reason, she took a special pleasure in this.

“You truly have a talent for this.” She complimented as she strolled to a door at the other end of the room. “This time together has helped me forget about the embarrassment of today. I would advise you to rest up, however…for we are not yet done.”

As she spoke those words, she gently patted what appeared to be a butt plug. And if it was indeed so, the sheer size of it caused Irma’s heart to skip a beat. She couldn’t question it though, as the Baroness disappeared into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. But what would follow next would be even more unexpected.

“YOOOOOOO, JOE!!!”

The voices of several women shouting and glass shattering were followed by sounds of the Baroness struggling along with several blows being traded and landing. The action would die down after a moment, as one woman’s voice would speak again.

“Lady Jaye to Base, the Queen has been captured. Repeat: The Baroness is in custody.”

“And I thought her perverseness reached its peak during that caper back in France.” Another woman said.

“I could care less what she’s wearing.” One more chimed in. “As long as I make my photo shoot.”

“Let’s move out!”

And as Irma lay in the bed, exhaustion limiting her movements, she could only listen as the three women secured their new capture and exited out the bathroom window. Part of her was relieved that the ordeal had ended, but another part was thankful for the most intense sexual encounter she has ever had. And as the T-Phone’s ring filled the room, she knew the woman responsible for it was calling her. Wearily crawling over to the foot of the bed, she reached over and picked the communicator up off the carpet before answering it.

“…Hello?”

“Irma! I thought something happened to you.” April said on the other end. “Did you get any information? Any pictures? Anything?”

Irma took a moment to reflect on the experience she went through before answering. “You know that Jem concert that’s coming here next month? Front Row tickets and Backstage Passes. No questions.”

[Victor2K]

Delicious story and look forward to read more!

[No Pants]

I only have one question...just what happened in Cleveland?!